I packed less this time when compared to last. I pack a little less each time.
If I look through the prism of Buddhism, attachment is unenlightened. By the slippery slope extension of my mind, attachment to objects is further and for shame. Yet still it pains to depart.
Lucy Dacus is singing her cover of In the Air Tonight and I cannot help but sing quietly along and remember all that’s left behind. Those things I chose and those ones I simply forgot to pack while I stress-sweat through my clothing. Bits of myself dripping away while down the road our state is burning.
Eddie Vedder is just audible with his Uke and I am thinking of the episode of Iconoclasts between him and Laird Hamilton and Laird’s wife Gabrielle talking about Laird between big wave seasons. The way he feels in those weeks and months as if there are no dragons to slay. She sounds resolute and powerful in her understanding of her mate as she reflects calmly on the way he is tied to the sea. Laird is an obtrusively powerful figure. His mood as it relates to the size and movement of ocean waves speaks to the vulnerability of a love.
Johnny Cash is covering Hurt by Nine Inch Nails and I’m recalling the way this song sung by him sometimes makes me cry uncontrollably.
Driving through the smoke I’m wondering how long I, we, the whole of us can stay at our next destination before fire drives us out.
Now Donald Glover and JD McCrary are singing Terrified
Days, a week…full of music I cannot now recall…then
Home again, home again.
All the things I packed are put away again. In ways just a little slight different than before. Until next time California, I’m with you
Nina Simone begins to sing her cover of Suzanne
A small smile